by Grace Huang
Art by Megan Xu
Issue: Nostos (Winter 2019)
i:
Just like my heart.
Thump thump lull.
Thump thump lull.
It’s normal.
There is nothing else because I’ve known nothing else,
Just as I’ve known nothing other than the clamor of the training grounds,
or the marble tiles of the palace,
or the flourish of trumpets as the king takes his seat upon the throne.
And all I can call the castle is home.
1.5:
do u ever think its weird how tall people are forever destined to b tall
Like
small bean [3:20 AM]
how hard is it for u guys to fit urselves into small spaces
and wow sleepovers must b real hard for u
and like if ur short u can always bcome tall
but if ur tall
small bean [3:21 AM]
ANN
IT’S 3 AM
tall giant [3:21 AM]
ur forever destined to b tall
ANSWER MY QUESTION
R U AWAKE CUZ U COULDNT FIT IN UR DUMB TWIN-SIZED BED
U AND UR LONG BEANSTALK LEGS
small bean [3:21 AM]
SHUT UP
I WANNA SLEEP
tall giant [3:22 AM]
ANSWER MY QUESTION LUKAS OR SO HELP ME GOD
small bean [3:22 AM]
YES I KEEP HITTING MY FOOT ON THE FOOTBOARD BUT ALSO IT’S BECAUSE YOU WON’T STOP SPAMMING ME
NOW GOOD NIGHT
tall giant [3:23 AM]
ii:
Just like my hands and feet.
They take me on an adventure up mountains and down valleys,
through dense forests and shallow rivers,
dancing with village maidens and cutting down dragons,
and really,
I didn’t want to go on this adventure because it’s all so,
so far away from the thumping thrill of my beating heart.
But I did it anyways.
Veni,
vidi,
vici.
2.5:
okay I’m all unpacked and moved in
I’m going to go now
I’ll miss you
tall giant [11:10 AM]
STOP UR GONNA MAKE ME CRY
small bean [11:12 AM]
if you need anything just call me
or, you know, drive up
I’m literally going to be an hour away
tall giant [11:12 AM]
UR THE ONE WHO STARTED THIS CONVO
small bean [11:12 AM]
ud better keep me upd8d lukas
small bean [11:13 AM]
define “updated”
tall giant [11:13 AM]
u have to call me everyday otherwise ur cancelled and no longer my friend
small bean [11:13 AM]
has anyone ever told you you’re a very clingy friend
tall giant [11:13 AM]
yes u just did
but its because i looooooove u
small bean [11:13 AM]
you’re insufferable sometimes
tall giant [11:13 AM]
iii:
Just like my eyelids.
One crease on the left and two on the right;
everyone said “something is wrong”.
Even as I shared meals with mercenaries and cut down bandits,
something tugged.
It nagged,
pulled at my throat and my voice and my gut and made me long for that once insufferable throne.
3.5:
I know you’re probably going to lose your mind that I’m up this late but I just
I love my roommates and my classmates and everything but no one here is like you and I know I haven’t texted you in a whole month but
tall giant [2:58 AM]
shit Ann I just really miss you and being able to hang out with you whenever I want to and getting dragged out randomly at night to hang out with you
tall giant [2:59 AM]
I just want to feel like I have real friends
tall giant [3:01 AM]
scratch that honestly I just want you here
god you’re my best friend Ann you know that right
I’ll never stop missing you
tall giant [3:09 AM]
omg lukas
small bean [7:23 AM]
hey
im always here ily ok?
im always here
small bean [7:25 AM]
i know
thanks
tall giant [5:39 PM]
love you too
tall giant [5:45 PM]
iv:
Just like my fingers,
but missing one.
For who can describe coming home but one who has truly left in the first place?
Go,
the queen had said when I left,
and explore the world to your heart’s content,
but pray do not forget us,
your home.
4.5:
r u having fun in ur crowded airport
+ tsa
this is what u get for going on vaca and deciding to come home now
small bean [5:03 PM]
there’s a crying baby on my flight
I don’t like it
tall giant [5:46 PM]
u dont like anything
small bean [5:47 PM]
I like sleep and you
tall giant [5:48 PM]
gh
HH
LUKAS CORON
small bean [5:48 PM]
don’t worry I’ll be back soon you can scold me then
tall giant [5:48 PM]
yeah yeah w/e
love ya u nerd
small bean [5:48 PM]
